Wednesday, December 28, 2011

A Long Explanation

Greeting citizens, I know no one reads this thing, except for few persons who know me. I believe no one has had the balls to ask: "what's this whole misanthrope thing about?"

Let's first state, I created this blog around 2009, with very different intentions. I wanted to write about serious issues, something more along the line of The Culture of the Weak (my other blog), and when I drunkly decided to create a blog for my personal thoughts (okay, a blog to spur all the random shit that comes to my mind), I was too uncreative to get a new title, and used this again.

Second, I do not hate all people, that's ridiculous, I know a small tiny fraction of the 7 billions (yes, we're 7 billions already). But I do feel strongly about what humanity is, represents, and I'm part of; the abstracts. For good and bad. I love reading about past cultures, mythology, scientific news, all the things we, as species have achieved. I can listen to stuff like Koyaanisqatsi's ST by Philip Glass, get goose bumps and an ear-gasm; by the way I adore that film, because I identify that same fascination for humanity, our failures and progress. I don't cry often with movies, but this had rendered me to tears, not sadness or trained empathy for fictional characters, just feeling overwhelmed by the epicness of music and visual input. Falling buildings and fast-paced classical music, have that effect on me.


Pffft, I just have something in my eye!

I'm also fascinated with myself, fuck humility (who needs that?), let's face it, we're egocentric creatures, I wouldn't be writing this blog, if it wasn't the case. Just like the other 7 billions are fascinated with themselves, that's the key of success of all those shitty social networking sites.

But I've found my fascination differs from most people, I promise, I won't fancy myself on this one, this is just the truth.

While the majority craves and clings to attention to try filling a void, the void left by a bad perception of themselves. I have this need to entertain others (preferably like-minded people). I denied it for the longest time, because I didn't want to feel like a clown, but a "serious artist". But I'm an entertainer, I was born one, I was dancing, singing and telling jokes for adults, at the age of 3, for christ sake. See the difference? I don't want to get attention to grow my ego. My ego is so fucking awesome I need to share it with others!

While the majority wants to attain a better status, by getting society's approval: buying expensive fancy things, getting a diploma, looking hot and having many "friends". I want to progress as a wholesome person, I want to be wiser, understanding; I need to feed my brain with new information, different points of view. It's just "my thing", and I couldn't ever quite understand why, it seems people with this same drive are almost extinct.

And so you can see my ambivalence towards humanity. This, of course, had a big impact in my lifestyle. I've hardly ever felt part of anything, even when I've been in the spotlight and surrounded by people, who like me for some reason, there's just this little voice going like "what a bunch of retards. I need to get drunk to stand this bullshit".

I'm now what some people call: a city hermit (not a basement dweller, I'm not pathetic, fat or ugly, and I don't fap to Sonic). Let's just say, my bullshitometer oscillates until it's all red, and them bam! "I burn a bridge". That's my hobby: I burn bridges. I've burnt many roads and hiking trails too.

There are probably some you, like "ME TOO! ME TOO!" Shut up, let's stick to the misanthropic thingy, and hate each other.

I'm not such a grumpy bastard, I swear! I like hanging out with people sometimes, like once a year! :)

2 comments:

  1. Weird things make you cry. Disney's film Cinderella makes me cry. And those "Donate now to save a pet" commercials, those make me cry too. Damn sad looking horses and kittens FFFF- Ahem. Wish I were reading this at home so I could hear the bloody sound...

    I'm stuck in this weird place where I want to love everybody, but they keep making me hate them. It's really hard to love everybody when they're gross or harass you, really hard. My solution would be to rid the world of the ones I hate so I can love all the awesome people! LOL And you can entertain us with your awesomeness because you'd be there :p

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  2. lol Explosions make me get goose bumps and cry, but it's out of pure joy, for some reason. There's a particular scene in Matrix. When they're saving Morpheus, and they're in an helicopter, it crashes against a building making this wave in the structure and BAM explosion... It gets me every time.

    It would be a wicked place. Just because of me... /narcissism :D

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